Friday, April 15, 2011

Ugh... Work

This may not be the appropriate outlet for this discussion but I am using it anyway!  Today was such a sucky day at work.  We were desperately short of staff and I was so in over my head with the group I had today.  I held a discussion with a student I have worked with off and on over the last 5 years.  The first time I had him in my class he was a 7th grader.  He is not a little boy anymore and towers over me.  I like him, my heart aches for him, he has been dealt a tough hand.  He has come a long way since I first met him and he has experienced things in his life that I am so grateful I didn't as a young person.  Today he made my life harder.  He does this many days but today just about broke me.  I almost stopped caring.  I pulled him aside after many times of trying to redirect and encourage him.  I asked, "Do you know why I am upset with you right now?"  He responded, "Because I am not doing my work today."  I let him know that I didn't feel that really affected me, he was the one who needed to graduate.  I already have earned my diploma.  What I was concerned about was the fact that I felt I deserved more respect than what he has been showing me.  He had nothing but sarcastic responses to everything I pointed out to him.  I asked, "Have I made an effort to take care of every reasonable request you have made of me?  Did I stick my neck out to help you get classes at your home school?  Do I show you every day that I care about you and your future?  Do you think I deserve more respect than what you have showed me today?" Nothing but sarcasm.  I am doing my best to not take this personally and I hope someday he will wish he had showed me more respect.  Or better yet, I hope he will show others more respect in the future.  It is things like this that wear me down though.  I wish I didn't care.

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